I’m sorta sat here at work kinda chest- pumping to ‘Me Against the Music’ by Britney and Madonna- ‘I wanna get in the zowwwwwnnn, I’mma takaa you owwwnnnn.’ You know that jam. ‘Let me see ya, I wanna see ya.’ Christ, some lyrics really are crap aren’t they? 

Soooo since getting my hair cut in Soho, I then went back and got it highlighted for a very reasonable £60, but I definitely said ‘please destroy my hair and make it white, thanks sah much.’ He didn’t, he did what every good hairdresser does, and subtly made my hair look as thought I’d sat in the sun for a day or so. How quaint for the other life Jenny. This other life Jenny probably also has savings, a drivers license and nice nails. THIS JENNY IS TRASHY AND WANTS TRASHY HAIR THAT SUITS HER TRASHY LIFESTYLE. Flipping hell. Anyways, so now my hair looks nice and I’m a bit down about it. 

On the upside, me and Gee are starting our radio show this Sunday. Y’all choon in now, y’hear? I don’t wanna hear any of this, ‘I’m not bothered about you or Gina’ or even, ‘Who are you? Leave me alone’. Excuses excuses! You gotta listen. I don’t wanna fob you off with the wrong website address, so just go onto google, search soho radio, then kerplam, you’re in it to win it. So Sunday, 2pm. Don’t be late! If you’re late I won’t ever know because I’ll be miles away and it’s more of a voice thing, but the guilt will drive you insane and you’ll get 6 months in prison for it.

On a lighter note, Percy Pig has got friends. Two of them to be exact. A sheep-cow and a cow-sheep. Not sure which is which, but the cow is coca cola flavoured and the sheep is really fluffy and cute and according to Gina looks like a placenta. Yum!

So I’m chowing down on Percy Pig, moo moo cow and placenta sheep, but later I’m going to eat Broccoli and rice.

Oh yeah I joined Fitness First. Wrote that as Fitness Fist first then giggled then was like oh god i’m horrible, fist is a normal word why would that make me giggle?

So the gym is cool, went to Body Attack on Monday with Gina at 7.15. Yes 7.15 kids, I plan to have a body so darn slammin, y’all gonna be like woah and i’ll do that ‘progression’ selfie thing. Probs won’t to be fair. I have one of those bods that looks great in clothes but naked it’s more like Salad Fingers from Youtube. 

Gina right this very second: ‘Omg my hair is full of milk’ (she spilled it this morning, it’s now 5.10pm)

Me (not really arsed, trying to type this): Oh yeah, haha…

Gina: No look! It stands up by itself!

Jesus Gina, have a wash child. 

Nah, in her milky defence there aint no shower at work. I’ll scrub her down when we get home, pre broccoli.

Gerry, Gina and I are going to IKEA soon to act out scenes in those pre made rooms. It’s going to all be about sustainability, then we’re going to get arrested and thrown out. The pandas are cool with it but the golden elephant CBA and is going to hold the fort. We’re going to text Jonie when we’re on our way home so she can make some sandwiches for our arrival. Cool beans.

On Tues (two weeks ago) we met up with the loverly Coley (Gina’s homey) and went to Vogue fashion parties. This sounds very glam but it required a lot of walking about. We took selfies and drank lots of cocktails and queued for a copy of Vogue.

I went to see my momma, not last weekend but the one before (where DOES the time go?)… that was all kinds of fun and I met the new cat she’s got called Jet who is CAAHUTTTEEEE and I wanted to squeeze him very hard and I couldn’t because I would crush his skeleton and I can’t imagine for a second my mum would be too happy about that.

Oh yeah, fucking Gina right. Yesterday she crept up on me whilst I was washing my face in the B-room, then THIS MORNING at the gym as I was MINDING MY OWN BUSINESS, she decides to push her face up against the opaque glass wall of my shower, which made me scream. I hate her so much.

Gina’s been painting a room at work called ‘The Snug’. It’s where we all chill and breakout creatively, and when I saw her handy work it was like looking at the ceiling of the Sistine chapel, props to you and high five and big hug and hand shake to you ma friend.

Sooooo Gina’s eloped with Michelangelo, milk and all. I’m just here, writing my blog, waiting for tidy-up-time (do you remember at school you used to put your chairs on your table and I used to sing, ‘it’s time to tidy up time’. But this one time at time to tidy up time some bitch, who I can’t remember the name of now, stole my cool strawberry lip salve that my mum bought me from ASDA after I waited for like a year before I could wear ‘makeup’ (note to everyone, yes my mum is a bit retarded and would constitute lip salve as makeup) DURING time to tidy up time because I was an overpowering child whereby I voluntarily went around making sure everyone has sufficiently tidied up. While the cat’s away eh? Not sure that fits there, but it’s a sad tale, one I’ll never forget.)

Future plans? Well now, tomorrow is Thursday and then by some madness it is then FRIDAY which means I might see SARAH who BAILED on me last weekend, so that’ll be nice, won’t it? Then Saturday Gina and I and loadsa people from work are going to Nikki’s (accounts lady) wedding bash. We’re going to dress up and look well good. We’ll put loadsa piccies on FB if ya want and ya can be like mergod Jenn looks right nice. 

I’m also sorry/ guilty for not taking better pictures for the blog. It’s because I’m lazy. But here’s one of me looking at Gina as she looks at me, taking a picture. It’s like inception or voyeurism or quinoa or something… 

To finish on, Gina and I now have a set of drawers from IKEA that we put our underwear in. 


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