Oh wow. Oh woweeee. I am one hungover lady today.

Yesterday morning we had breakfast club with Twatter (lord of the dance) which was yummy. He complained about having too much apple. Bore off Twatter. 

We also looked after the Topman site again. I think i’m getting into the swing of it…

More importantly, it was all systems go at the Goon & Croth residency. Fake tan, face masks, razors at the ready. Not in that order… that means you’d be shaving off dead sea clay and St. Tropez and end up looking like you’ve had a terrible accident. Anyways, the point is, we got ready for LADIES NIGHT #yeah #woo #hehe #tampons.

We merrily skipped to Sainsbury and bought some delicious red vino, which went down a treat and I got absolutely baddered/ sloshed/ smooshed/ floored/ windowed/walled/ sweat dripped down my balls (what). I got drunk.

I looked great. (My blog, can say what I want)

Our beloved advertising mandem (damn you squiggly red line, why do you make me feel so illiterate? Just because you’re not familiar with groovy words like mandem) came along for shenanigans (Aidan, Tori and Zoe). We drank at the Boogaloo, then Aidan kindly drove us in his batmobile to Jalouse. A surreal moment, whizzing through Mayfair listening to french language tapes. It was so nice to see some familiar faces.

So bumping and grinding of the messy variety ensued with my fave people. Ando and Tay or ‘Aussie Boys’ as they’re sometimes referred to, joined us. A particuarly good moment was when Ando started yelling at Proudlock from MIC. Good work.

After many glasses of wine, I found myself half asleep, on the floor of Oxford Circus, chowing down on a Subway with Gina and Tori. Now listen up men of the world… How is it that as I gobbled on a chicken sub, sitting on fag butts, a little cross eyed, supporting my friend as she snoozed, do I get propositioned for 3 dates?? That’s right, 3. Although I probs won’t go on one of the them as Gina very insightfully pointed out that one of the guys was indeed, 16 years old. 

Once back, the fabulous three (questionable adjective here, possibly insert alternatives i.e, sloppy sisters, trashed trio, loose ladies…) rocked up home  at aprrox 400hrs. I really don’t remember making any conscious efforts to get into bed, but the next thing that happened was Gina waking me up, because it was 8am and we had to do a different kind of grind- the daily one. (I hope that reads well, it’s pretty clever) Tonight I have a few evening activities in store, such as to finish the latest episode of The White Queen! Jury is STILL out on medieval incest (obvs jks, don’t agree with incest, but I can see where the bloke is coming from, keeping up appearances for his court and maintaining a fresh vibe). I am a tired teddy, (But Jenn, your writing is so fantastic and the wit is unsurpassed). 

Note to self: If you’re trying to cover up the fact you’re a total car crash of a woman, orange lipstick and red jumpers don’t go together. (Just seen my reflection)

Ah yes, pictures… some are self explanatory. #GIRLSCLUB. The one of the guy playing the guitar is my friend Tom Grocott. Admist my horrible icky sticky hangover this morning, I came across this picture and it cheered me up tremendously. Tom is literally one of my most favourite people in the world. If he ran for president, I’d vote. You know one of those people who literally have no idea how wonderful they are? He’s one of them. Hi Tom. 

The first image is a self, no apologies, soz. I’m drinking wine cos that’s just literally what I’m doing, i’m drinking wine and that’s about it. Cool shirt tho ey? 

Let’s see… yeah the others are when Zoe got to ours last night for pre drinks and we had some (more) wine on our roof terrace. It was a beautiful night. This is the most sophisticated thing I did all evening.

I look inexplicably brown. Probs not inexplicably because I definitely have been using a shit tonne fake tan. God bless you St. Moritz. 


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